It comes a time in our life when everything is going good, finances, career, and social circles. Then we even work up the audacity to open ourselves up to dating. And as usual, life does not work in our favor, in some twisted faith the right person comes into our life when we are ready. But sometimes the wrong person comes into our lives and shakes it up to be a lesson needed to: move on, learn, or change.
What does it mean to have the wrong person at the right time, millennium translation; projecting a desire of what you want and being attracted to the wrong choice. When you have that opportunity to date you become vulnerable in certain areas, and you attract someone to temporarily fulfill that void.
This person is the absolute worst choice to make because that passion will die fast when you get taken out of your comfort zone, and the choice becomes more of a power struggle.
Why are you looking?
If you want to find true love, stop the search. When you are not looking for love, you stop attracting the wrong choices. It is okay to date, but love comes in different forms. When you least expect it, the perfect person for you will enter your life and you’ll know because they fulfill you and show you new things while teaching you about yourself.
The quote has a deeper meaning when you are older. As humans, we naturally want companionship, but that is the very thing that separates us. How many times have you seen a couple and thought I wish I had that or saw someone alone and think, wow something must be wrong with them, I don’t want to end up like that.
The problem is that we fear loneliness, but it is when we are alone that our true self comes out. The darkest times show us what we are capable of and the true power we have. And loneliness is all about your perception, you can be negative or see this as a positive way to see what you like and dislike.
When you aren’t looking and take it as a journey to discover yourself, you learn self-love. In the wise words of Ru Paul ” If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?”
You attract what you are
This is the hard truth in the situation of the wrong person at the right time or what some may call karma. But I think it is the opportunity to evaluate what you are doing and what this person was put in your life to teach you. You may have a bad choice due to past trauma, or toxic traits that have impacted the lives of those around you.
In this case, it’s a game of karma in that wrong person, it is time to break the pattern and change. The person for you may not come until you change a character trait within, and that takes power.
This may be a hard pill to swallow for some, but you will get the person that reflects certain negative traits as yourself, not a person you truly want. This is one of those hidden gems in life, attracting what you are ready for so be the person you want.
When that window of opportunity opens in your life, you’ll rush because it feels like the right time to find love right? WRONG! This process will have you lowering your standards for someone just because they’re available and willing to date.
This wrong person is a settlement, someone you don’t desire for longevity, just a person for a good time, not a long time. Please do not lower your standards for someone just because the time is right, wait a little longer or take the lesson and move on.
The wrong person being in your life is just as bad as a frenemy. They’ll drain all of your time and energy. And the worst thing about time is that you can never get it back, but you can learn from it.
That wrong person stresses you out and brings your energy down fast! Leave them where you found them. Physical and mental health is a priority to have in your life and if they are negatively impacted, then that is your clue that you are dealing with the wrong person for you.
Looks Vs. Personality
This person was very appealing to the eyes and looks are very deceiving. This appealing person may have caught your eyes but in time that terrible personality exposes itself. A personality can change the way you view a person before looks can.
Learn to fall for personality over looks. This is why it is important to get to know people from views on topics, communication styles, and love language. You know what they say the person for you looks nothing like the person you prefer.
We love to point the finger and say this person wasted our time while in fact, YOU may be the person who is wrong but won’t let them go. The longer you force the situation the more time you waste that could be spent learning yourself. Be aware of the situation, the signs, and their presence.
Of all the cheesy love quotes I have seen the best one is “There is someone for everyone” which is true, the “my dating life sucks now” is just your negative feelings to an image you placed in your head because your fantasy isn’t being fulfilled. Just take your single life as an adventure to get to know abilities about yourself and loving yourself.